Wake up.

wake up.. esther..


Is ... early in the morning 4:14am now.. Tuesday... i haven't sleep yet, or suppose I should say , that is my time..everyday... typical me isn't it ? ;)

Listening to one of Minmi's popular songs , Who's Theme , which was one of the theme as well , in the animation of Samurai Champloo..... I have to admit that , I ... Love it. I was falling in love with it , just when the intro cames into my ears...I don't know why...Some sort of blue feelings it would brought me into...sad.. but at the same time, sexy.. intimate...cute.. sweet.. happy.. i love the feelings that has been brought up totally by this song ~Like i could Imagine lots of different things from this special songs... Him... of course , and my .. blue life. Miserable , but , dreamy. I never wish my dream will end up somewhere else , but at the same time , i do hope , i could wake up from it and discontinue with it. Confusing .. indeed. Haiz...

I heard one of this phrases before , from a guy , whom I found him mature , and deep. Sometimes , i don't even understand what sort of msg is he trying to send me , yes , that shows me even more childish and less understanding than i thought. I always argue with him , when he told me that >> ' We are in a dream call youth. Someday, we have to wake up from it. ' I will never understand what that phrases mean and why ? That time , i thought , why ? If , you have a youth in your heart , you will always have a youth in mind!! And what he did was, he could only smile to me , and staring somewhere else with a pair of cold , nostalgic eyes ( like he was trying to send me someting more , but he stop ) then never reply my question anymore... For now.... i understand fully about this phrases. It was true. And why would he stop telling me ? Because i will never understand it unless I discover myself. Then i realize , is really time for me to wake up than drowning myself into that old , past years esther again. I m not , and I shall not be the Queen anymore. The , So call ego and emo Queen. For what egotism and emotional does to me.. has no benefits at all , but only the word cool. Yes , I can be myself , and be rebellious whenever i wanted to be.. but at the same time, I will lost every sense of maturity in my mind, one by one. Judging sense, professionalism , Manners ... and so on. But that's youth isn't it ? Always talking about setting me free and stuff , happy like it does , shouting here and there , being crazy for everything, no pain no gain , try on everything they thought it was cool. ;) ... I love it, but is enough i guess , my youth life.

And , I will say that again... and again.. to others.

' We are in a dream call youth.Someday, we have to wake up from it'

Introduce to you guys , Who's theme by Minmi's , enjoy.